Tuesday, January 05, 2010

"...But My Soul and Spirit Are Well."

So, I've never really used this blog for posting my thoughts. I (rarely) post pictures and stories for out-of-town family and friends to see. But I'm needing to write about some thoughts today.
Ten months ago, my dad was diagnosed with mantle cell lymphoma. For his two children, this seemed so frightening and worrysome. But he and my mom handled the diagnosis and coming treatments with ease and comfort. They displayed little concern, and I worried that they were either putting on a brave face for us, or just not really understanding the gravity of the diagnosis.
I was glad he was pursuing some great treatment options, as well as dealing with all of this in a way that honors God. John Piper's Don't Waste Your Cancer was helpful to us.
His treatment is progressing well, but we really have no idea what the future holds. He did several rounds of chemo over the summer and that went pretty smoothly. The month of December 2009 was spent at UCLA Medical Center where he underwent an autologous bone marrow transplant and INTENSE chemotherapy. He left the hospital on Dec 28, to stay at Tiverton House, a nearby convalescent-type facility. Yesteray, January 4, he was given the go-ahead to return home and resume his normal activities. He'll leave tomorrow (1/6) to do that. What a praise that all has gone so well! He was very sick for a couple of weeks, but He has kept faith that God is in control of it all. Even spending Christmas Day in the hospital, feeling nauseated, couldn't dampen their spirits.
And now, the good check-up meant that yesterday was a day that should have been filled with joy. However, it was also the day my mom received the results of her biopsy done last week. After 2 abnormal mammograms, the biopsy was ordered, and her cancer was detected.
I can't help but cry out to the Lord. This isn't how it was supposed to go. One cancer at a time, God! And yet, I know that I must trust! My mom told me the news this morning. I missed her call last night, so I called her on her way to work this morning. She said, "My body may be falling apart, but my soul and spirit are well."
I am stunned by my lack of faith. I may think that I trust God for the details of life, but how quickly I doubt His plan. I am focused on the temporal and not on the eternal. I worry over not being there to help my parents, but they are living daily with The Helper inside of them. We are not left alone by our Savior, and in that I take comfort today - for myself and for my two cancer-stricken parents.